When I say I’m going to the library, I mean that I am going down to the publicly owned facility where I can borrow a book that has undoubtedly changed hands more times than I’d like to admit. I am most certainly NOT talking about a room in my home. When you’re livin’ the life of the rich and well-read – “library” probably refers to a wing of your estate filled with million-dollar finials, smells of rich mahogany, and that fine leather chair passed down from your grandfather, Archduke Somebody of Somewhere Important. The closest thing to a library in our house is a bookshelf filled with quite the collection of literature  (e.g. Atlas Shrugged, The Abs Diet, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus and R. Kelly: Soulacoaster) – all this on an Ikea bookcase that cost us about $100…probably less.

For today’s installment of High Society, I’m reaching beyond the world of paper products and into the realm of office supplies for the upper echelon… because, really…you just can’t pass up the chance to get snarky about a $365 pair of bookends? Let’s do this.

{What They Say} Set of acrylic bookends with gold giraffes. 7.5″ tall. Available in Gold. Handmade in Italy.

{What I Say} There is really no difference between two bookends and two bricks. Except in this case, where the difference is about $364.50. What kind of books must you have in your “library” that you can’t risk them touching anything less than the price of plane ticket. Maybe an autographed original of the Dead Sea Scrolls?  Definitely not this week-old issue of People that’s sitting in front of me right now.

All I can think to myself is: “How much must you love giraffes to drop this type of dinero on giraffe bookends?”  I dont think there is anything you could put onto a pair of bookends that would warrant this price. I take that back. You could attach a stack of 365 one dollar bills…and in that case, they are worth every penny. To be fair, the description does say “gold giraffes” – and if that’s true, these suckers are a steal and we should all order a set, melt them down and put them into a college fund. Since we all are fully aware that these are not 24karat giraffes, I think we can agree that no one is buying these any time soon, other than Mr. Archduke Somebody. He probably owns a whole menagerie of bookends…cause you know rich people love a menagerie. Don’t worry though- I do have a solution for us lowly regular folk. How about we make some giraffe bookends? You are gonna love how these came together.

{1} Chipboard and cardstock die cuts of the giraffe shape from Clear & Simple stamps Baby Shower {Large} set. You will need 18 cut from chipboard and 4 cut from cardstock, to be assembled as shown.

{2} Acrylic Cement and applicator, both available from TAP Plastics.

{3} Four acrylic stamping blocks. I used these.

{4} Mod Podge and a sponge brush for application.

{5} Spray paint (not pictured)

{1} Pour Acrylic Cement into applicator bottle and apply a very thin stream of the liquid between the acrylic blocks. This adhesive is only for acrylic and will meld the two together so that they actually become one piece. If it gets on anything else, it won’t adhere it to you blocks, so don’t worry. It’s very easy to use and works quickly. You’ll want to hold the block into place for a few minutes until it is set. I’d suggest wearing plastic gloves while you do this just to be safe.

{2} With the blocks adhered, allow them to rest while you work on the giraffes.

{3} Apply the Mod Podge between each layer of chipboard and cardstock to create the giraffe.

{4} The layers should look like this when done. Allow the pieces to rest and dry for about 30 minutes.

{5} Spray paint each giraffe with the color of your choice.

{6} Use a hot glue gun to adhere the giraffes to the acrylic bookends.

I’m tempted to add a tag to these that says “These bookends did not cost $365” – but that would just be tacky, right? Instead, I’ll just put those copies of Atlas Shrugged and Soulacoaster between them – nothing says wealth like R. Kelly’s Soulacoaster. Take that rich people!